“…you reap but by the seeds that you plant” Robert Louis Stevenson
Yesterday, Thursday was the day. The day I had my egg retrieval. I would have written sooner, had I not been completely wrecked.
My day started at 6:50am…. It should have started an hour earlier, with a shower running a brush through my hair and breakfast for the BF, but I never switched my alarm on, we woke up to the BF’s alarm. A few moments later a phone call from the FM saying he was at my place. We are awake and in a panic, trying to dress and gather stuff together for the procedure.
The three of us are in the car and on our way a little after 7, late but not too late. I sat in the front with the BF and the FM was in the back seat, I wasn’t quite awake so I wasn’t as chatty as I normally am on these car rides to the clinic. My appointment was scheduled for 8am. We arrived at 8:11, not too bad for waking up super late. I was ushered in quickly, with the FM, the BF stayed in the waiting area with his iPod touch and his freshly brewed tea. I walked into the retrieval section of the clinic with a nurse and the FM, the nurse told me to change into a gown, hair net and some non-slip socks (I was able to keep my bra on). The nurse had the FM put on a yellow gown, booties over his HUGE boots and a hair net. It was the most amusing site, like a deranged lunch lady. A lunch lady with fierce side burns.
I moved into a retrieval room and sat in the medical chair, it has stirrups attached and it reclines with the push of a button. I was prepped for the procedure, my IV was started and I was fitted with a blood pressure cuff and a heart monitor. A heated blankie was plopped over my lap, and the nurse tucked me in. It was nice. A slew of nurses, techs, embryologists, and doctors came in, verified my name, birth date, health history, donor number, etc… Each time a new person came in they were surprised by the camera. Everyone did a great job, on and off camera.
There was another patient, going through the same procedure in another room, her procedure had taken a little longer than had originally been anticipated. So mine was pushed back a bit, the FM and I were left in the procedure room for a while. I can’t wait to see that footage. I took over the camera for a few moments so I could catch the FM in his crazed lunch lady gear. I hope he puts some of those out as stills. We joked about how moments like this would be great if we had a behind the scenes crew to film, or take pictures of us. It was nice to have someone to chat with while I waited.
The head nurse wanted to know if the FM wanted to film the procedure. We did but the FM had some concerns, he didn’t want to be in the room. Even if the camera didn’t catch a cooch shot, he didn’t want to see one. We did a filming “dry run” my chair was reclined and I was put into the stirrups with my bits covered of course so the FM could frame the shot. This was rather amusing.
Meeting the doctor was great, he was really interested in me, why I was doing this and why we were having this filmed. He was hoping that this would end up on Oprah. The clinic really wanted the procedure to be filmed, so it was decided that the camera would be set up on the tripod for a fixed shot on the ultrasound monitor. The doctor wanted to teach the staff how to use the camera, so they could zoom in for the FM. The FM didn’t like that idea, he wasn’t afraid of the staff touching the camera, but that the staff would accidentally get a shot of my strawberry patch. As soon as the anesthesiologist knocked me out the FM ran off, and the next ten minutes or so was a blur.
I don’t really recall waking up, I just remember the FM telling me that one of the nurses came out of the procedure room holding the camera and tripod (camera still filming, they were afraid that it would run out of film. The FM is hoping the staff covered me up before they moved the camera. I hung out for a little while, the staff wanted to make sure that I was stable and that I could leave. I had a very successful retrieval, 18 high quality eggs.
I was set up with some baby aspirin, a antibiotic and an additional shot (to prevent blood clots). I kept the non skid socks too. No idea why, I might be a hoarder. They don’t reuse them, and I didn’t want to toss them.
I got to leave with the BF and the FM, we went and had bagels. I think that the BF wanted to eat some greasy food, but I was specifically told no greasy food, clear liquids, maybe a bagel or so. I like the bagel and the cranberry juice. I was starving at this point. I was feeling no pain, we drove home.
When we arrived home the FM wanted to take some shots of me on the couch. I was under a blanket in no time. We chatted on camera for a few minutes, then I slept for hours. I felt bloated and sore at this point, I felt like I was kicked in the ovaries by a large man in steel toe boots. I couldn’t sit, I couldn’t get up my stairs and I couldn’t get off the toilet. Thank goodness for the BF. Thank goodness the FM wasn’t around for that. We can leave certain things to the imagination. I won’t leave my bloated belly to the imagination. I’ve posted a picture of it. (my tummy is not this gross normally)
I feel asleep around 9ish and woke up at midnight with hot sweats. Great, the pseudo-menopause has begun. I spent the next couple hours tossing, turning, sweating and crawling to the bathroom. I made the poor BF crazy. My sheets were soaked, I could have sworn I had totally peed the bed! I didn’t pee, I am sure of it, it was sweat (anyone want to sleep over).
To the poor BF’s dismay I needed spotter in the shower, I still couldn’t stand up completely. Generally if I ask for a spotter, he doesn’t mind, but there is no vagina-business for at least a week (I thought it was two weeks).
I got dressed, the BF made me some breakfast and I made an attempt at working. I drove to the office, needed help getting out of my car, and could not get up my office stairs, so I took the elevator. I sat down at my desk and immediately started to tear up, it hurt to sit. I mean really hurt to sit, like my insides were going to fall out.
I lasted at work for less than an hour, I moved some appointments around and waddled out. I spent the next few hours on the couch, I gradually started to walk around the house, I made myself some lunch (hunched over). The highlight of my day was the vast amount of old movies I watched on netflix, and sorry folks, the immense amount of gas I was passing. I learned that the puffy belly, is a combination of fluid and gas. My poor BF. He is lucky he spent the day at work, away from my funky ass.
There is SO much I am leaving out. I’ll toss a few of those stories in over the course of the next few days. Time for some meds, my heating pad and another old movie. Oh and some ice cream, the BF brought me some Ben & Jerry’s. Yummy.
MellFire 